Planned on having an early night but it’s now 1:45 and I’m wide awake and I have a very important 10am seminar. Shoot me.
October 18, 1993: Backstage at London Fashion Week. Photo by Dave Benett
Either stu has the most vile cough ever or he’s just whitied upstairs and if he has it’s hilarious.
I’ve eaten a whole pavlova to myself today. I need to be desperately sick.
I hope I know you or that cheeky might have creeped me out a bit. My first time was not how I imagined it nor am I pleased it happened, but I was 15 and seeing a boy in the year above, and it happened and it was really weird and I didn’t like it and I wasn’t sure what I was doing and then he sacked me off which made me feel like a million dollars. I kind of felt I had to as all my friends had but looking back damn do I regret it. I don’t regret who, more than anything I regret where, when, why and how. Losing my virginity was apparently more important than keeping my dignity to my 15 year old self but what happened happened and I’m over it.
So for Marco and I go to Rome in August for 4 nights, stay in a 4* hotel with wifi and breakfast included in a super deluxe double room, with flights, airport transfers and a tour of the colosseum, I’m looking at £1018. I don’t think that’s too bad, however I might see about taking him at new year, it’ll be cheaper off peak and it might be nice to get away when it’s not sweltering hot, but it’s warm and different.
Not tired enough to sleep, too tired to do anything productive. I’m going to continue sitting in bed smoking and reading Jane Austen.
I have the flat to myself until Friday as Tom and Stu are going home. First thing on my list: walk around naked.
An ex best friend.
We weren’t ‘best friends’ if you like for a particularly lengthy time, when we first met in year 7 but then stupid petty arguments led us to not talk until we were 14/15. She’d never had it particularly easy and there was a period of time where she was staying in a hostel and she spent an awful lot of time staying round mine because she didn’t want to be alone and we genuinely had some of the best times. We were so close and there was nothing I didn’t tell her and vice versa but then after about 2 years it completely broke down and it was all my fault. She tried to warn me about my ‘new boyfriend’ as she had got to know his ex girlfriend really well and I just ignored her and put him first and never saw her and everything just went tits up. Before we left school we patched things up and we became friends again I suppose but obviously it was too late and too stupid to ever get back to how we were. She’s travelling with her boyfriend now and I’m so happy she’s happy and making the most of her life, but she was genuinely the best friend I had ever had at that time and screwing her over is one of my biggest regrets because she’s such a nice, genuine girl.
If I get this job and I work enough hours I’m going to take Marco to Rome at some point in the next 12 months. I’ve never been to Italy and I really want to go, and despite the fact he lived in Italy for a really long time Rome is one of the only places he’s never been. I need to save A LOT and it might be a bit optimistic but I seriously want to do this.